All is well

Each day we awake to someone else ill, having a bad day, including the days that are used up for grounded punishments. This is our life, at the moment, and I find myself irritated with fading joy to continue at this pace. The pace is not fast, it's actually more like taking 2 steps forward and 6 back. The reason you don't see photos of the apartment yet is because it DID look good, for about a week until after Luke vomited all over the ottoman and carpet...well, I am still cleaning this up.

In spite of small set backs, we are blessed. Blessed with new friends on campus willing to be with the other children as I nurse myself and now Luke. Blessed that these new friends are always available to lend an ear during our family's transitioning. Blessed with one particular seminarian who, when he found out Luke was sick, came over with an icon of St. Luke. Blessed that Luke, and I quote: "I have a bestest buddy and his name is Isaak, or Cracker or batman". Blessed that in between studying for Greek my husband took the baton of care taking so that I could enjoy the first Ladies gathering on campus. We went on a scavenger hunt and found new places along with realizing that I am actually comfortable in driving around this much congested area. Blessed with our faithful friends back "home". Blessed to celebrate the Feast of the Nativity of the Theotokos, even though we napped, and ate leftovers...it was relaxing.

It seems that this new life has simultaneously birthed and rebirthed new with old emotions, feelings, sense of loss, uncertainty mixed in with letting go of the old to put on the new. It is not easy to shed these layers, actually it is quite painful some days. However, the result, I believe, is freeing while I forgive, fall down, get back up again, to only forgive, fall down and get back up again...my personal Podvig or Ascesis. Growing my Hind Feet toward the High Place.

Honestly, there shouldn't be any complaints coming from me. Life is good...when you continue to place God in the forefront. But you see, I haven't, even here in seminary life where one can attend church everyday. My daily prayers have vanished and I sit, or rather fidget, wondering "Why in the world are my days so frustrating?"

Life without struggle is no life at all...for in these struggles we discover ourselves -- we discover that our Heavenly Father has not abandoned us but that we have abandoned Him for our own agendas, our own will and not His.

May I continue to remain joyful, peaceful, grateful while placing my life, entirely in the Lord Jesus Christ -- the Lover of all mankind, the Son of God and the Holy Spirit.

Requesting your prayers and as I pick myself back up, you will be in mine.

All is well...God is so Good!